Death of Flaming Toad Spit
"Yes, I suppose it is flammable... where is this heading?"
habnabitmkiii : Hi.Bryce : Konban wa.
"Why didn't you catch him?"
"I was... arguing with my sword."
habnabitmkiii : Hahah!
Bryce : Sentient artifacts are the best RPG idea ever.
So, last sunday's game - It has been a while, so I'll briefly get you up to speed to the best of my ability.
The party whopped the AOE (main bad guys) and celebrated. There was some drunkenness. Space Gnome figured out that Biptetk had told Olivia that Space Gnome was trying to kill her, which had caused a great deal of problems for the party in their final epic battle.
Specifically: Olivia repeatedly trying to off Space Gnome in plausably deniable ways.
habnabitmkiii : Hah!
Bryce : These included:
Olivia: "Go ahead and fireball them, don't worry if they have countereffect, I have it too."
Space Gnome: "Okay."
(Space Gnome uses fireball on the enemy psionist.)
(Olivia pretends to faint)
BOOM! As fireball is countereffected back on Space Gnome.
Space Gnome: "THANKS Olivia... ouch..."
The preliminary attempt at killing Space Gnome having failed on account of her ability to take a fireball (remember, Space Gnome is awesome, after all), Olivia then took an alternate plan:
Olivia: "Okay, go in, I'll cover you."
Space Gnome: "Right."
Olivia: "Opps. The door closed somehow. And it looks the the password changed. Sorry you're locked in there with twenty bad guys and several giant robots."
habnabitmkiii : And she escaped anyway?
Bryce : Yes... I don't remember the details, but I think it involved the door being opened with Space Gnome's lightsaber. Oh, yes, and of course most of the bad guys being killed by her anyway. Awesomeness and all, you see.
habnabitmkiii : That's what I was thinking.
Bryce : Actually, I do remember one horribly disgusting part. So, there is this bufoid among the bad guys, and a psilon. The psilon has countereffect, it is keeping Space Gnome from using any of her favorite explodey psionics. A bufoid is a toad-like alien that can shoot a variety of slimes at its enemies.
Go ahead and ponder where this is going if you like...
So, unbeknownst to me at the time, Space Gnome had taken a few levels of Empath, and had learned a Mind-Control psionic.
See, she holds psionics in reserve, I think, for occasions like this. She has quite a few that she never or almost never uses, part of what I assume is a (somewhat successful) attempt on the part of her Player Character to make me forget she has them.
So, "I use Puppet Master on the Bufoid," says Space Gnome. (Space Gnome rolls well.)
GM: "Okay, you have control over the Bufoid for... 3 rounds."
No big deal, right? My fiendish GM plans to kill his overpowered character in a way that can be blamed on another player (Biptetk, who caused Olivia's paranoid attempts to off Space Gnome) were not seriously threatened, right?
Space Gnome: "I make it spit all of the kinds of spit it has at once on the Psilon."
Kaaa----LOOOOOGIE!
habnabitmkiii : Hahaha.
{ Note - Space Gnome remembers this incident a little differently. Space Gnome says the combination of spit was due to unfamiliarity with how to operate the Bufoid's anatomy. This could be; I don't remember with certainty one way or the other. }
Bryce : It gets worse.
So, the Psilon is covered in disgusting slime, which is chemically reacting and causes the bufoid to explode.
Space Gnome: "So, is the psilon distracted?"
GM: "Well, yes, I suppose he is."
Space Gnome: "Does bufoid slime burn?"
GM: "I guess... why?"
habnabitmkiii : >:D
Bryce : Space Gnome: "I use Flaming Death VII!"
Bryce : ...
The time: Moments later. The Place: Psilon afterlife.
New Guy: "Hi. I guess this is the afterlife, eh?"
Old Timer #1: "Indeed. I am Klargon-Zembadamar, The Mighty Archpsion and one of the Death Guards of the Empress Jami XI, Lady of Shades. I was killed in an awesome psionic duel with the Twelve Traitor-Mages of Dodrixum. It went on for six days and leveled half of the Capital."
Old Timer #2: "And I am Blargon the Magnificent, a Warrior of the Mystic Blade of Zuberion, and general of the Army of Planet Psionica. I met my destiny while at the command of my legion of two-hundred-thousand of the God-King's finest men. We engaged the enemy army of Abominations, destroying millions of the hellspawn, but their evil leader broke through our defensive lines and I had to saccrafice myself to destroy him."
Old Timer #1: "Yes, and all of us here in the Psilon Afterlife had similarly worthy and notable pasts, because we're such an awesome species, even cooler than gnomes. So, what's your story?"
New Guy: "I was killed by a flaming blob of spit."
habnabitmkiii : What was his HP in the end?
Bryce : We use hit locations in our Pencil-and-Paper RPG. So he was "maimed everywhere", but suffice it to say that if we used HP it would have been very negative.
Anyway, either the Flaming Death area of effect or the toad explosion took out a lot of the bad guys, which enabled Space Gnome to stay alive long enough to escape.
He was starting to figure out that Olivia was trying to kill him, but didn't attack her, because "I know she must somehow be important to the plot, but I'm not sure if we're supposed to kill her or not."
habnabitmkiii : Hahah.
Bryce : So. A long time ago, Josh's character was invaded by these nanite things, in an interesting sequence that he didn't know was real or not, right?
habnabitmkiii : Right.
Bryce : Well, they were real, and were in fact mind-controlling nanites. They were keyed to obey Olivia, but she hadn't used them on him up to this point.
Olivia decided that now was the time. Josh fell under compulsion to go and kill Space Gnome.
habnabitmkiii : Ehehe.
Bryce : Space Gnome of course knew this was happening, but only as player knowledge. It came as a suprise to the character when Josh shot at her.
I gave Space Gnome extra XP for actually realistically believing that this was a weapon malfunction / fumble.
Because I fully expected an urgent attempt to launder the player knowledge into character knowledge.
habnabitmkiii : Hah!
Bryce : By this time the battle was quite intense, though. The bad guys were losing, and one of them had activated the self destruct.
Because of her excessive speed (Haste Yourself to Victory is on the bookshelf of every psionist, especially Space Gnome) and propensity for rolling unnaturally high when it counts, Space Gnome evaded Josh and got out of the ship, thus foiling Olivia's attempt to kill her.
Josh, however, remained trapped on the ship by his poor rolling and the nanites, of course, now in "Okay, well, you still have to die so she doesn't find out our master was trying to kill you" mode.
So, uh, boom. He and the ship got blown to bits. (I was accused of blowing up the ship so as not to have to roll up all the loot that it surely would have contained. This wasn't true, but would have been if I'd realized the obvious fact that the players would have looted the ship.)
Josh was pretty miffed, and in fairness this had been his most developed and interesting character yet. So I decided to try to ease the blow by telling him as much and also telling him (in secret) that during his character's final seconds of life, he had a moment of mental singularity with the nanites and found out exactly why Olivia wanted to kill Space Gnome and had, in the process, caused his death.
habnabitmkiii : Hahahahah. And what did he think of that?
Bryce : Well, he seemed somewhat consoled about the first part, and apparently no longer thinks that I like to kill him off for fun. (Which is correct. I don't. )
However, the second part, which I intended to be just a bit of wrapping up/resolution for him so that he could see that there was an actual reason for it, ended up growing into a horrible meta-game mission for revenge on Biptetk for the death of his character.
So, he made a new character. This new character has, in almost every game, tried to find out about the old character.
habnabitmkiii : Haha.
Bryce : He knows that Biptetk's player won't let him get away with having his new character attempt revenge without an actual reason.
So his new character, named Link, is on some sort of epic knowledge-laundering quest.
habnabitmkiii : I see.
Bryce : For instance, he drove Olivia (who has unresolved guilt issues about being responsible for trying to kill Space Gnome and causing his old character to die as well) nearly to tears trying to pry information about his old character out of her.
And last game he hacked into the ship's personell records trying to find out about his old character with his new one. This was screamingly funny because of the way he did it.
From the moment he started getting into those records, just about everyone realized what he was trying to do. So he asks me what he sees in the records.
"A list of all the people who have been on the ship."
"Who?"
"Well, you'll have to be more specific, who are you looking for?" <- Me, trying to get him to admit that he is looking for his old character and genuinly fearing having to come up from memory with a list of all the people that would logically be there.
So after a few back-and-forth comments that fooled no one (least of all Biptetk's player) and only made it painfully obvious that he knew that he was meta-gaming and trying to hide it, he finally used his character's name and got the file.
"So, what does it say he died of?"
_Josh fantasy sequence: (Hypothetical)_
GM: "Why, it says that he was killed BY THE EVIL ROGUE BIPTETK, who convinced poor, nubile Olivia (who secretly loved you) to use you as a living weapon. Reading about this makes you really angry at Biptetk, and you feel a natural kinship with this person who's personal records you are invading."
GM: "Also you find a lightsaber. It has a purple blade, and when you wield it, you hear a voice: 'I, the soul of MACE WINDU, Will help you strike down Biptetk with the power of the Force in me!'"
Josh: "Okay, with Mace Windu's aid from beyond the grave, I teleport behind Biptetk and impale him with the lightsaber!"
GM: "You do so. He dies."
Josh: "Yay!"
habnabitmkiii : Hahahahahah.
Bryce : Back to Reality:
GM: "He was killed when the AOE mothership exploded."
Josh: ... oh. Okay.
Bryce : Just to make things... interesting, though, I think I'm going to let him find out about his old character.
The Revenge-Based School of Game Mastery tells me that I should do this in a realistic way, by, say, having a drunk and emotionally vulnerable Olivia confess everything to his new character.
The Loki School of Game Mastery tells me that I should take him aside and tell him that it is revealed to him in an oracular vision of some kind. Then, when he acts on it, and Biptetk complains that he used player knowledge, he will say "It came to be in a vision!"
Then then... he will ask me to back him up... and I will say: "Well, I can't really say one way or the others, that would be player knowledge for the others."
MUAHAHAHAH.
habnabitmkiii : And did you?
Bryce : I haven't yet.
Right now their characters got telepathically linked by brain-bugs, so that needs to be dealt with first. (Because Biptetk would know that Josh was telling the truth about any oracular visions or drunken vulnerable Olivias.)
But I am leaning heavily towards the second plan stated above, because of the element of ironic justice.
habnabitmkiii : Hehe.
Bryce : Anyhow. As I said earlier, Olivia and Space Gnome worked out their differences. Then Space Gnome and Biptetk worked out their differences. Even Biptetk is afraid of Space Gnome.
So the party left planet La Hu, and headed for Dramidia. Why? I can't say I rightly know, but it worked out smashingly, plot wise. I think they picked up the plot-sign on the "newspapers" I'd been writing that described the fact that a war was going on there.
Plot-sign, you see, is that ephemeral but very real substance that allows player characters to detect:
(1) Quests
(2) Important NPCS
(3) Adventuring parties composed of other PCs.
habnabitmkiii : Other PCs?
Bryce : Indeed. As in, a player makes a new character, shows up near the party.
"Hey, look at that guy. He's exuding tons of plot-sign. He must be a PC!"
"Yeah, you're right. Hey dude! Want to join a band of adventurers?"
"Sure, you look like PCs! Thanks!"
"Welcome aboard!"
habnabitmkiii : Haha.
Bryce : That's how about 75% of new character introductions go, usually with less talking though.
habnabitmkiii : Hahaha.
Bryce : Sometimes, of course, NPCs suddenly become posessed by players and treatment of them changes at once. This is perhaps the most certain proof of the existance of plot-sign.
Captain Idiot insisted that his new character join the party at once, rather than when they got back to the city. Since the only people around for miles were the prisoners the party had taken from the big AOE battle, he was incarnated into one of them.
"Look at that prisoner! Plotsign, all over him!"
"Woah, it wasn't there before."
"He must be... a PC!"
"It's Edward, reincarnated! Yay!"
"Dude, so glad you respawned. Come on out of the brig, buddy. Have some weapons and gear we're not using."
"Thanks guys!"
habnabitmkiii : But doesn't that kind of thing happen in any given RPG?
Bryce : Pretty much. It's just funny to me.
habnabitmkiii : I can imagine.
Bryce : Okay. So, fast foreward to a waypoint on the trip to Dramidia: Planet Giewentch.
Bryce : So, the players get to Giewentch. Biptetk finally gets his artifact sword repaired by some psitronics experts, and the group befrends some Vulpinian students.
The students hired them to take them to Dramidia.
I dropped about twenty hints that these students wanted to go there to join the insurrection against the Imperial Army that was occupying their native planet, but Biptetk seemed willfully oblivious. Space Gnome tried to point it out...
"Their reasons for going are vauge and implausable. There are posters all around with anti-imperial slogans. They are buying lots of weapons..."
But the Vulpinians were friendly and they did help get Biptetk's sword fixed, so rebels or not, that's okay. (It is better this way, anyhow.)
Long story short, the Imperial Sectoral Governor ended up being assassinated in a bombing while the PCs were there, and the Vulpinians talked the party into evacuating a few of their friends because of the inevitable reprisals.
And by a few I mean 109 of them.
habnabitmkiii : Hahah.
Bryce : As their ship was packed with furry refugees, Josh's new character (Link) and Space Gnome bravely fought off an Imperial death-squad.
Space Gnome: "Okay, I haste myself."
Space Gnome's Player: "Okay, that's my turn. Josh, you should haste yourself too on your turn."
Josh: "I don't have haste."
Space Gnome: "What? I thought you were a Bright [a type of psionist]. Look, it says it right there on your character sheet, "Natural Bright"."
{Almost all Brights have Haste. It's broken.}
Josh: "Yeah, I am."
(Space Gnome looks at the character sheet.)
Space Gnome: "You don't have ANY psionic powers."
Josh: "No. So?"
Space Gnome: "You're _useless._"
habnabitmkiii : Hahaha.
Bryce : Space Gnome (no doubt figuring: well, he can still hit them with pointy stuff): "Fine, I'll haste you."
So, Space Gnome's next action comes around, and she hastes Link.
Link's turn: "Can I shoot them yet? [re Bad guys]"
GM: "No, they're still too far out of range."
Link: "Well, I guess I wait."
habnabitmkiii : Hehehehehehehe.
Bryce :
GM: "Okay, for your next action? You have 17 left."
LinK: "Uh... I go on the ship."
Space Gnome's Player: "Hua?"
GM: "Okay, you go back on the ship. 10 Actions left."
Link: "I look around."
GM: "Roll perception. ... Okay. You see some refugees... the ship is pretty cluttered. Oh, and there is fur everywhere on the ground, and in the air; Vulpinians shed when they're nervous or stressed."
"You have 9 actions left."
Link: "Okay, I collect some hair."
Everyone: "Hua?"
GM:"... Okay. You have a goodly wad of fur." "And 8 actions left."
Link: "Okay, I go outside and talk to [Space Gnome]".
He does so.
Because of the extended nature of his useless conversation, it ends up costing Space Gnome several standard actions. (IIRC most of the conversation had to do with the hair.)
Finally, on Space Gnome's next turn: Space Gnome: "I'm never hasting you again."
habnabitmkiii : Hahahahha. Did he do anything with the hair?
Bryce : He dropped it at some point, I think.
Some serious heroic stuff happened, involving the bold rescue of refugees, and the ship got underway. Of course, they didn't have enough food to feed all of these refugees, so they stopped at a Freeport (space station outside Imperial jurisdiction, at least in practice) to get supplies.
We're on part II of that tomarrow, so I'll let you know how it goes.
habnabitmkiii : Okay.
Bryce : Oh. One really funny thing happened. It is the answer to the question: "When is rolling a 20 a bad thing for the roller?"
habnabitmkiii : Hahah.
Bryce : Josh's cousin, Andrew, is rather more mature than his sibling despite his age being a few years less. However, he's a pretty funny and entertaining guy in general. His character, Joe, recently picked up/invented a new religion that apparently revolves around the rejection of footware.
He has at just about every opportunity attempted to proselytize. Thanks to a few good rolls, he has one disciple now. So, the two of them go to preach to the Refugees, a captive audiance of emotionally vulnerable people.
He has some moderate success with that, some of them are listening. Then their Priest shows up and gets into an argument with Joe.
They go back and forth a bit. Finally, Joe challenges the Priest to a fight. The priest responds by pointing out that "The sacred books say that the False Prophet will bring violence!"
So, Joe hits him with a holy book. (That was being used for reference)
"Okay, Andrew, roll for to-hit."
(Rolls) "Oh... I just rolled a 20."
"The ample tome smashes into his temples. He falls over."
"The refugees stand up. They look very angry."
"Uhoh."
"One of them closes the door."
habnabitmkiii : Haha.
Bryce : The result? He got beat to an inch of his life and probably would have been killed if not for the intervention of his teammates. And that is how rolling a 20 can be bad. Yes, the Priest was killed, but the other players didn't like that character either, and he wasn't that important to the plot, so no biggie.
Anyway, goodnight.
habnabitmkiii : 'night.
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