The Random Rangers in

The Adventure of the Sexy Cake


Chapter 1 - The New Case





The Rangers are in their tree waiting for an interesting crime. Chip is reading a Sureluck Jones story, The Case of the mirror of yore . Dale is watching television. Gadget is tinkering with an invention, a sad nugget.. Monty is telling a tall tale concerning his doings to find the evil cheddar. Zipper is flying. Without warning, they got an email, telling them that Rat Capone had ilegally created the Sexy Cake!
"We have to thwart Rat Capone and destroy the Sexy Cake, or else he might use it to get pie!" Chip suggested. So they went looking for Rat Capone and the Sexy Cake.
Meanwhile, in the subway system, Rat Capone told his minions about his plan. "My plan is to to get revenge on Zipper ", explained Rat Capone. Of course, they wondered if he also planned to control the bucket industry now that he had the Sexy Cake. Rat Capone replied that he would indeed, and he already thought of it . They all appreciated their clever plan.

Chapter 2 - The Search




The rangers were looking for any sign the Sexy Cake or Rat Capone.

Chip looked around professor Nimnul's laboratory. Nimnul's laboratory hums with malevonent machines. Chip dilligently looks for evidence of the Sexy Cake. Chip finds a spleen , undoubtedly indicating by simple induction that Rat Capone is hiding out in the subway system . He goes there to investigate. Dale looked around the sewers. The sewers are infested with crocodillian thespians. Mepps is there. Dale goes unnoticed. Gadget looked around the bank. The bank, adjacent a chair store, is smelly . Gadget methodically checks the place. Gadget finds a broken notebook . Examination of it with her microscope, clearly indicates by trivial logic that Rat Capone is hiding out in the subway system . She goes there to look. Monty traveled to the park. The park is sunny. chipmunks are playing. Sparky is there. Zipper traveled to the bank.

Chip looked around the subway system. The subways are the black roosting place of the leotard of might. Fat Cat is there. Wart is there. Bubbles is there. Lahwhinie is there. Rat Capone is there. Chip spies on Rat Capone hiding in rafters. He observes Rat Capone implementing his plan to get revenge on Zipper . Chip goes unnoticed. Dale looked around the park. Gadget went to the subway system. Gadget spies on Rat Capone, carying the Sexy Cake. Fat Cat kicked Gadget. Gadget is gravely wounded. Wart bit Gadget. Gadget is severely hurt. Gadget, stricken by Wart's attack, falls over, bleeding heavily and says " Golly, this smarts!" and perishes. Bubbles goes to attack Gadget, but she is already dead. Chip attempts to sneak up on Wart. Chip tries to escape. Gadget tries to escape. Gadget wanted to escape but was dead. Monty searched the subway system. Monty watches Rat Capone lurking in rafters. He thinks that Rat Capone's plan is to take over the duck industry. Fat Cat swatted Monty. Monty is slightly wounded. Wart bit Monty. Monty is slightly wounded. Rat Capone missed Chip. Monty body-slams Fat Cat. Fat Cat is gravely hurt. Chip tries to escape. Chip flees the battle! Monty tries to escape. Monty flees the battle! Zipper looked around the city museum. The museum is having exhibits on a Egyptian leotard, Ancient California, and the obscure royal stick's spice rack of super duper virility. Zipper searches the location. Zipper discovered nugget leavings and a bit of ice fur but couldn't connect it to Rat Capone.

So the Rangers located the location of the Sexy Cake.

On the way to the Ranger tree, Zipper is caught in a a glue board set by Rat Capone. Luckily, Chip heard his screams and rushed to his aid. Chip eventually helped Zipper from out of the baleful trap and back to the Ranger tree.

Everyone gathered back at the Ranger Tree.

"I have a light wound by Wart's attack!", Monty complained. " This reminds me of the time I rode a fatty rod in Iraq"

"Don't worry, and I learned First Aid in the Boyscouts ", Chip said. Chip bandaged Monty's wound. "There! All better! ", Chip said. Monty felt better. Chip devises a plan. Chip comes up with a clever scheme to defeat Rat Capone and explains it to the others. Chip went up to Gadget.

"I really am hearing a lot about your well-known cleverness , Gadget", said Chip.

"Did you forget that now I am dead?", replied Gadget. The discussion was interrupted by their leaving to go to Rat Capone and recover the Sexy Cake.

Chapter 3 - The Battle




Getting to the subway system, they initiate their attack. Fat Cat is wounded. Wart is greviously wounded. Bubbles is only very slightly harmed. Lahwhinie is greviously wounded. Rat Capone is greviously injured.

Fat Cat missed Chip. Wart missed Zipper. Rat Capone missed Chip. Monty attempts to bash Fat Cat with a gray fishstick.

Wart kicked Chip. Chip is severely wounded. Bubbles missed Chip. Bubbles yells at Chip, "Your problems result from having pathetic excuse for a tail!" "Sticks and stones! " Chip replies. Rat Capone missed Monty. Zipper taunts Fat Cat. Fat Cat is slightly wounded.

Wart stomped Monty. Monty is hurt. Lahwhinie swatted Chip. Chip is greviously injured. Rat Capone hit Zipper. Zipper is maybe mortally hurt. Zipper dies with a splatting sound.

Wart missed Dale. Bubbles bit Chip. Chip is maybe mortally injured. Chip fell dying of Bubbles's attack. "There's diamond dust in my sock drawer! Have Foxglove raise me!", he panted before dying. Lahwhinie hit Monty. Monty is only very slightly harmed. Rat Capone goes to attack Chip, but he is already dead. Monty throws a staff at Lahwhinie. Lahwhinie is greviously hurt. Lahwhinie dies, clutching her injured foot.

Wart missed Monty. Bubbles missed Dale. Rat Capone missed Monty. Dale trips Wart. Wart is slighty hurt. Monty hurls a good staff at Fat Cat. Fat Cat is seriously hurt.

Wart missed Dale. Bubbles kicked Dale. Dale is injured. Rat Capone stomped Dale. Dale is slightly wounded. Dale jumps on Wart. Wart is slightly wounded.

Fat Cat missed Monty. Wart hit Monty. Monty is slighty hurt. Bubbles missed Dale. Rat Capone stabbed Monty. Monty is hurt. Monty clobbers Wart. Wart is only very slightly harmed.

Fat Cat missed Monty. Bubbles bit Monty. Monty is slightly wounded. Rat Capone hit Monty. Monty is slightly wounded. Dale jumps on Rat Capone. Rat Capone is hurt. Rat Capone perishes, clutching his bladder. Monty flings a plastic banjo at Bubbles. Bubbles is slightly wounded. And so, with Rat Capone dead, they got the Sexy Cake and escaped.

Chapter 4 - Epilogue




Although coming at great cost they had triumphed and ensured that the Sexy Cake was out of Rat Capone's hands forever. Chip got a state funeral. Gadget got a proper Zoroastrian funeral. They had a funeral for Zipper who died of Rat Capone's attack. Apparently both Chip and Gadget died, so there is no insipid romantic subplot in the conclusion!
THE END!

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Illustrations copyright 1989 the Walt Disney Company. The content of this page was generated programmatically using Python, and the UVTOS scripting language by Bryce Schroeder.